I was married in my twenties and had a beautiful son and daughter within the first few years. We were divorced after six years and I became a single mom. The kids and I went to church twice a week throughout their entire lives, I prayed with them every day and I often lectured them about the evils of drugs and alcohol, thinking that my words could prevent them from going down the road of addiction and troubled times.
My daughter Andrea started drinking in middle school. The first time she came home drunk she was 15. I went out of my mind with fear and worry. The panic in me and alcoholic behavior in her continued for the next 10 years. There were many, many times I wept with grief and felt a despair that I did not know existed. I lectured, blamed and scolded my daughter. I wrote lengthy contracts about the behavior I would and would not tolerate in my home, to try and control her behavior. The hardest part was the disintegration of our relationship and the guilt and shame I felt as her mother. I couldn't understand what I did wrong and often ruminated on the past and what I could have done differently. Eventually, I found Al-Anon, a fellowship for the family and friends of alcoholics. It wasn't easy and oftentimes brought confusion for me as I tried to practice detachment from her and her behaviors while still loving her. I stopped providing her with money and a place to live and I let the natural consequences occur without interfering. She was incarcerated several times, which was very difficult for me to accept and believe. How could my precious little girl be an inmate in jail? There were years she was homeless and estranged from family members. It was when she was living in L.A. with her 'on and off again' boyfriend that she got pregnant. Initially, it felt like the end of the world to me. How could this possibly be a good thing? She was very sick in her addiction and now was carrying a new life inside her. Her boyfriend wanted her to have an abortion and she had nowhere to go. She asked to come home. Knowing what I did, after all the repeated tries of having her live with me with bad results, I said no. That was one of the hardest things I've ever done and also what I knew was God's will for me. A friend told us about Casa Teresa and my daughter called. She was accepted and given a beautiful place to live! If I said thank you to God every minute of every day for the rest of my life for all that Casa Teresa has done for my daughter and granddaughter, it wouldn't be enough. God saved their lives through Casa Teresa. My daughter was enveloped in a loving community that accepted her and did not accept half-measures. Each time I saw her, I noticed changes in her. She became humble and grateful. She took responsibility for her choices and began to clean up the wreckage of her past. She started to laugh more and trust that the staff wanted only the best for her. She had the support of Dr. Pugh, Nurse Kerri and all the staff who taught her how to take care of her new baby and how to navigate the world as a sober young woman. Today, she has over 5 years of sobriety and is a completely transformed person. She is an incredible mother with a fantastic job, beautiful apartment and restored relationships in the family. We have a wonderful, loving relationship, one filled with honesty, trust and respect. I don't know if my daughter and granddaughter would be alive today, if it wasn't for Casa Teresa. How could I ever say thank you enough for that? Read Andrea's Story Make a gift in honor of a special woman in your life:
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